A clear conscience is a prerequisite for happiness. You can have more money than you could ever spend, live in a beautiful house, have a sports car collection rivaling Jay Leno’s — and if your conscience is burdened, you will not be happy.
This is a human trait and one which seems fairly universal. Even the meanest of murderers and scoundrels invent ways to place blame upon their victims in order to pacify their own consciences.
How do we keep our consciences clean in the real world? Ronald Reagan had the answer when he said “There are no easy answers’ but there are simple answers. We must have the courage to do what we know is morally right.”
That’s how you keep your conscience clean — you do the morally right thing every single time. Often, the morally right path is the harder path, the less pleasant path, the more costly path, the more dangerous path — a path with no redeeming qualities other than that it is the right path.
What do we do if we have strayed from the purer path? We must find ways to make peace with our consciences. This is not a religious act, this is a human act. Religion may be able to help some of us find peace with our Gods — but we alone must make peace with ourselves.
We must forgive ourselves for our past mistakes without enabling ourselves to accept future mistakes. For most of us — for the best of us — that forgiveness does not come cheap. There is a show on television now called My Name is Earl, where the main character tries to undo all of the wrongs he has done in his life. Luckily, very few of us have a list of wrongs as long as Earl’s!
My Name is Earl does, however, give us insight into the path towards self-forgiveness and happiness. That path involves making the world a better place. Often, we cannot fix the things we break. We can’t repair every injured feeling. We can’t bring people back to life. However, we can devote our time and energies to making up to the world as a whole for our shortcomings. This is not an easy answer, but it is a simple answer.
As Mark Twain said, “Let us endeavor to live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.” That is the path which brings lasting happiness.
March 12th, 2007 | Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments
“It is not the level of prosperity that makes for happiness but the kinship of heart to heart and the way we look at the world. Both attitudes are within our power . . . a man is happy so long as he chooses to be happy, and no one can stop him.”
March 5th, 2007 | Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments
February 19th, 2007 | Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Human Needs is an extremely valuable tool in understanding how happiness is achieved and maintained.
Maslow’s hierarchy is usually envisioned as a pyramid, with the most basic and most important needs at the bottom of the stack.
As each of our levels of needs are met, we start to worry about the next level of the pyramid. A person who cannot breathe does not spend a lot of effort worrying about self-esteem issues. But, when his physiological needs are met, he does begin to worry about his safety needs.
People at one level of the pyramid often mistakenly believe that they will be happy if only they can get to the next level. Then, when they achieve the next level they are surprised to discover that they are not happy.
One incredibly important key to happiness is to enjoy the process of moving up the pyramid. As each new level is achieved, there will be a temporary rush of joyful celebration — but it will soon subside as you acclimate to the new level and see the challenges presented by the level still above you.
Achieving stable and lasting happiness requires that you are able to appreciate the progress that you have made and the joy that you will receive at each level of the pyramid which you achieve in the future. The requires a holistic viewpoint of the struggles of your life, an understanding that these struggles are a gift, and an appreciation of the joy that these struggles can bring.
February 19th, 2007 | Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments
One of the problems with many happiness programs is that they insult your intelligence. You’re not stupid. You can’t fool yourself into being happy. You have to convince yourself to be happy and you have to be believeable when you do so.
It’s easy to think of the things which make us unhappy. Write down a list of things that you have to be happy about. Make each item a real item — something which is important to you.
Here are a few examples:
- I have a wonderful family.
- I have a wonderful wife/husband.
- I am in (generally) good health.
- I work with some great people.
- I live in an awesome country.
- I live in a nice house/apartment.
- My future looks brighter than my present or my past.
- My kids will have a better life than I did.
- I have a job and I do it well.
- My car is reliable.
- My conscience is clean.
- Through hard work and intelligent effort, I am able to affect my future.
- I can go outside today if I want to and feel the Sun on my shoulders.
- I can read a good book this week.
- I possess unrealized potential.
Not all of these will apply to everyone. Make up your own list. Don’t bullshit yourself. Each one must be something which is important to you personally.
Keep the list with you. Review it when you’re feeling discouraged. At times, you will need to strike items from the list. As you do, work hard to replace each item with a new one. Happiness isn’t a static thing. Every new day gives us new ways to be happy.
February 16th, 2007 | Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments
Far too many people spend their lives searching for happiness when they should be making it instead.
Happiness is not something that you can find in other people, other places, or other experiences. Happiness is something that you have to create within yourself.
Your happiness is your own responsibility and it is one of the most important responsibilities you will have in your life. Get to it!
February 16th, 2007 | Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments
